I had one of the kinds of dreams I hate: where I dream I'm having a recurring dream (but I'm not) and I know that if I can just concentrate on it hard enough, I'll stay asleep for long enough to find the place in the dream that's safe, that I used to go when I was tiny. There's always a guy, some strong rough-handed beautiful man who is waiting there to look after me, who has waited since I was four or five or six or seven, who has been in his other world, that I dreamed myself into, wondering where I'd gone and whether I'd be back.

I just want to feel safe for a while. It is a pity that genuinely is too much to ask most of the time. I'm going to cry for a bit now, and get over myself.

Edit : which is helped enormously by fanfiction, as always :
"Oh, Kommandor Spock, pleece fuck me. Pleece, I am wirgin, be gentle, not like Keptin Kork."

"You're a lunatic, Yelchin." Zach growled.

"Hmm, I'm not the one who gets hard for a seventeen year old Communist stereotype with a speech impediment."

\o/ Adorable.
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